These are very much unfinished and written on the spot, but here you go :-) In the spirit of my silliness, these aren't to be taken too seriously! Oh, I do admit I'm using Ordains some are seriously subscribing to as somewhat of a basis for these ones, but every great author (ROTFLMAO here, then ROTFLMAO some more) draws from some or another inspiration!
1. These are the Fayward Ordains. Do what thou Wilt with them, as I'm sure you will! Adopt what ye will and poke holes to (and have fun with) the rest with your heart's content. I don't mind - I encourage it!
2. Don't hold on to absolutes too eagerly. Absolutes have the nasty tendency of becoming obsoletes when enough people poke enough holes in them.
3. An it harm none, do as ye will. Yes, that's the Wiccan Rede. Do note that it's the Wiccan Rede, not "everybody's Rede". Oh, and please remember that Rede doesn't mean "law". It means "advice". It's a goal to strive for, not an unbreakable absolute.
4. If you know the Rede is being broken, ask yourself if it really is the Rede being broken or just your interpretation of it. Ask yourself also, whether you'd break it in the similar situation yourself or not. Then consider if the person in question is following said tenet before starting to preach about how wrong it is to break it...
5. Learn to discuss and debate, even on matters religious. Especially on matters religious. It'll do you good!
6. Think about how you feel about others who boast or try to come out as Powerful and Dangerous. You seem the same to others when you do it.
7. For all things good and pure - wash yourself and your clothes every now and then! The only "power" that makes people to shun you when you arrive may very well be the power of your BO.
8. Don't take tasks you can't accomplish and when you happen to do so (which happens to everybody), give up before you burn yourself out. However, don't under-estimate your skills, either.
9. Strive for balance, but realize that "balance" may well be only a way for you to rationalize the chaotic world we live in. Besides, you don't have to have 10 days of madness to balance off 10 days of utter happiness!
10. Do what you do, but take responsibility of your doings. Rationalizing something as ethical or right does not necessarily make it so.
11. Ever mind the Three Fold Law. If you believe in it, that is. Don't try to make others to believe in it or dismiss them right off the bat as being inferior to you or unethical and they might just let you believe in the TFL in peace without writing lenghty essays on why your Law doesn't work...
12. You are not alone in the world, so stop acting like it!
13. At least try to be truthful to yourself. If you can't trust yourself to be honest to yourself, who can you trust?
14. A closed mouth may not gather feet, but a closed mind doesn't gather knowledge.
15. The road to platitudes is paved with worn-out truisms. A bit like the above Ordain.
16. Enjoy your spirituality, let others enjoy theirs.
17. Learn the "why"s as you learn the "how"s. Preferably the former before the latter.
18. Remember that there are many ways of doing things, of working magick and doing rituals. Yours may be the best one for you, but others do quite well with theirs. Don't try to make them change their "errant ways".
19. Learn to use and work energies, regardless of where you believe they originate from.
20. Use your common sense. You should have it in your head somewhere. I hope.
21. S/he who knowingly or unknowingly breaks the Ordains is bound to suffer from bad conscious for doing so. But only if s/he believes (for some strange reason) that the Ordains are absolutes.
1. If you make a mess of the Earth you live in - you have to live in that mess. You have to live in other people's mess to begin with, so why add yours to it?
2. Recycle, do try to sort your trash, please don't live a "buy, use, throw away, get a new one" -life. See the Ordain above.
3. Deities tend to like offerings. Learn what they do like and give gladly.
4. Learn from other people's paths, even if you don't agree with what they teach. You'll learn something valuable anyway.
5. Stealing is wrong and can get you in jail. So say the mundane laws and you're pretty much expected to live by them. Not minding other people's copyright is stealing, by the way...
6. Be hospitable to strangers, but don't get used by greedy or self-righteous people. You have the right to set the rules in your home and on what terms you're friends with people.
7. See to that your terms mentioned in Ordain # 6. are reasonable!
8. In your love-life and relationships - don't just think about yourself, think about the other people involved as well. However, some level of selfishness is permittable - otherwise you'd end up all alone or with somebody nobody else would ever want. Don't get together with somebody because "nobody else came along", because "s/he said s/he loves me (never mind how I feel), or "it's what is expected of me". Relationships built on strong friendship may last long, as can relationships built on strong lust. However, don't expect the heat of a new relationship to last forever. The everyday life will hit you and if you can't live with that, well - it might be better to stay a "single but dating".
9. Have children, but only if you and your spouse(s) really want to! Children aren't your trophies, they aren't a tool to boosting your ego, they aren't something you make just to have somebody love you because that's what they're supposed to do after you bring them to this world, they aren't something you are "supposed to" have when you reach a certain age. If you do have children, bring them up to be healhty adults in body and in mind (as far as possible). Don't just think about learning from your parents' mistakes - do so.
10. Your children don't have to be genetically your children to be your children.
1. Don't out folks. First of all, it's highly annoying and sometimes even dangerous to the people you out. Second, you'll soon realize that you've been ousted. Even the most out and about Pagan doesn't want to have just anybody behind her/his door. Ask first before promising to introduce somebody to a friend of yours. Thanks!
2. If you are out - even to a few people - you are a representative of the Pagandom. Don't make the rest of Pagans be ashamed of belonging to the same big sub-group with you.
3. Gossiping is human. However, don't over-do it. People tend to dislike those who tattle too much.
4. Magick isn't really for you to brag around with. If you know how to use it, you don't need to boost your ego with it.
5. It's a good idea to write down what you do in your religious practice, what you experience and your ponderings. At least you'll be able to look back at your development in years to come :-)
6. If you run into something interesting on your way, don't just think "I'll get back to that later on", grab it. If you're as foggy-headed as I am, you'll forget to go back to it until you either don't know where to find it anymore or forget what you were supposed to look for altogether.
7. If you write down very private things in your Book of Shadows (or whatever you call it), it may be better not to have people peeking in it.
8. Don't lose your tools. It can be quite hard to replace them, not to mention the stress of losing something you've grown very attached to. This, of course, doesn't apply if you don't use tools in your practice.
9. Learn to bless and bane. Both have their uses, but neither should be used whimsically.
10. Don't act vindictively, but don't let yourself become a door-mat either. Sometimes just banishing and/or shielding isn't enough, but action must be taken.
11. Dont' hide behind "Rede's" or "Laws" when you're just trying to find excuses for your inaction or downright apathy. Isn't choosing not to act an act as well (and for those believing in cosmic come-backs something that comes back to you)?
12. Learn about the astral and thought-forms, but don't think yourself as sooo powerful that everything you imagine will manifest.
13. Realize, that you are (or, IMO, should be) on a never ending path with always new potential for growth. If you think you've learned all there is to learn, you're delusional.
14. Sometimes accidents and bad luck are just that. Don't go around blaming yourself or others because of them.
15. Deities seem to have a sense of humour (why else are we here?). However, it might be better not to try and push it too far...
Here ends The Fayward Ordains.
Hey! I said they ended! Go on your way already!